Day Three - Not so much...

Oh how bad I was today... Subway... at least it wasn’t McDonald’s and I’ll make up for it with my workout. I know I’m going to be over my calorie count today and I’m ok with that. There’s no point in being too hard on myself when I slip. Because I totally will slip. And I totally understand why. Little disappointments do a lot to mess me up. I KNOW this. But I can’t seem to help it. Feeling slighted? Eat the second half of that yummy pastrami (yes I know there were a lot better options for a woman counting calories but it was so yummy). Get rejected again? Have some chocolate covered hazelnuts (not that I need too big an excuse to eat those). But all these little yummies add up to pretty big numbers when they’re all factored in. I don’t have a solid vent for all the junk so I turn to food and books - neither of those things are particularly good for my figure. Today I rewarded myself with an installment of JD Robb’s ‘In Death’ series and was pleased as I often am with that series. I have no idea what I was rewarding myself for - but I also am not going to pick at that particular thing too much. Hell, even if I did have a solid vent to type person, I still wouldn’t burden them with my issues. My issues at this point are small and matter to no one but me. Especially when every single one of my friends is going through issues right now that are a lot more burdensome then are mine. Though, down deep, I’ve only ever had one person in my life I felt I could tell absolutely everything to, no holds barred. I married him. My mom came close, but there were things I kept from her to protect her. Sounds stupid maybe, but in our situation, it was the best option. Before anyone reading this gets offended by that, don’t. I don’t like sharing my angst, my insecurities, my anything unless I feel they need to know that someone else has been there, that someone else gets it. It is not my place to make heavier the burdens of my friends who already carry too much. In short - today was not so good in terms of my long term plan but it won’t put a kink in the path either so it’s nothing to worry about.

Tonight’s exercises will ease up a little on my poor legs which still haven’t forgiven me for abusing them two days in a row. Tonight is yoga and ab work. Then, if my legs feel up to it, some kettlebell swings for good measure. It’s hard to do too much when the kids are home so I tend to wait until they go to bed. I could have done my exercises while they were at school, but I’d hoped to spend the morning with the hubster. Didn’t necessarily play out the way I wanted thanks to a delay and an impromptu lunch gathering he went to with a friend of his, so housework and books for me. I’m hoping this snow nonsense lets up and clears up in time for a normal school day tomorrow. I have things I want to do, dagnabit. Like play on the wii and work on organizing the youngest boy’s room or run a few errands than need running.